Wednesday, September 23, 2009

Hail To the Queen

I've been sitting on some information for a few days while I waited for things around me to unfold. The things I've been waiting on have fallen in to place and are in such a way that I can now share with you what has been going on. You just never know who could be reading your blog, so I kept things quiet until I knew for certain that things were done and not going to negatively affect the people involved.

I got a phone call from my oldest daughter (Queenie) on Saturday afternoon. She was extremely upset about things that have been going on in her world and how they are affecting her desire to move forward in an effort to make a better life for herself. After talking to her for about 10 minutes, she told me she wanted to come home. I thought she meant come home to the city, not my (our) house, but that is exactly what she meant. Factor in Cute Boy and a sister that has been the only child in the house for quite some time, this is a huge life change for everyone! It has been 2.5 years since she has lived under my roof and with me parenting her.

There are things she has experienced that I will probably never understand, nor would I want to to be completely honest with you. I'm keeping an open mind and doing everything within my power to make this as smooth a transition for all parties. There will be growing pains, of course, but I'm hopeful that things will work out okay.

I have spent and inordinate amount of time on the phone (major dislike of mine) coordinating with the high school here to see that they will accept her as a student again. The Vice Principal has been incredible to deal with. Queenie has been in an independent study school, in the city she lives, for about a year now. She has been accountable to herself and her studies. No one there making her get up and go to school. No one to care that she is getting her work done (Teachers, yes. Parent, no) In the past week the counsellors and teachers at her current school have enabled her to get her final compulsory credit and filed the appropriate paperwork for her to get her work experience credits. If things work out the way they are supposed to she should have all her credits by the end of first semester (January) and graduate in time for college this fall. That would put her only one year behind her intended graduating class. I'm optimistic that Queenie will make the most of this second, third or fourth chance. It's been a few second chances.


I've been in communication with Cute Boy's niece about her helping Queenie get a job at Montana's. Queenie has worked her way up in East Side Marios and is currently a waitress and wants to continue with that here. Keeping my fingers crossed for her.

Cute Boy has been amazing through all of the communicating. It is awe inspiring what can be accomplished when two people work together and communicate with how they feel in a certain situation and what their expectations are. I'm glad for his support and understanding. As hard as this may be, he's rallied behind me and is in complete agreement that the best place for Queenie is with us. Just typing that sentence has tears in my eyes.

There are bedrooms and dressers to be moved around. Furniture to be packed and moved from 1.5 hours away to our house. Cute Boy and I are hitting the road on Wednesday of this week to undertake the daunting task of packing up my baby and bringing her home. It will be bittersweet because of all the moving she has done, she doesn't own a lot of stuff and that is just a bit of a heart tugger for me.

I'm not delusional in the fact that I think life is going to be a bed of roses. There are certain expectations that Cute Boy and I both have for her and from Princess as well and getting them may be a challenge. I hope it is understood that as much as I am the mother, Cute Boy is an adult in the house and he is to be respected and appreciated for what he does for each of my daughters and for what he brings, as well. I think Queenie has seen enough, done more than enough and done without enough that she will appreciate the basic necessities of life such as a hot shower, rather than one lacking the heat, food in the fridge, a closet for her clothing. The list goes on.

I guess, as Cute Boy's niece said, "Never say never". I really never dreamed in a million years I would have both my daughters living with me under one roof ever again and what do ya know! In one short week, the life I know right now will be completely different.

A few good thoughts that things work out for Queenie from now until the time she's home and then when she gets home, would be greatly appreciated. Things in her current living situation could still blow up any minute and that causes me great concern.

That, my dear readers is the news from my house to yours!

Hugs and love!

8 comments:

Pumpkin said...

Oh Tammy, this is wonderful!!!! I know it's something that you've wanted for awhile now. It will take some time for everyone to get used to the new member living there but be patient. I wish you and your family all the best :o)

Bre said...

COOL!!! I wish you the best in the transition!! ((HUGS)) all around!!

Kristin said...

Oh Tammy...I know you never expected this but I also know how badly you wanted it. I am so happy and truly believe you can make it work. {{{Hugs}}} and prayers.

Chiloe said...

I hope she will appreciate all you do for you. I hope she will go back to study and fullfill her dreams !!! Wishing you the best for the four of you!

K-Pow said...

Whooo Hooo!!

I'm so happy to hear that things are turning around.

Never say never is so right!

Fingers & toes are crossed that everything goes smoothly!

Hugs & Kisses & lots of warm wishes!

Velda said...

I think I'm having a panic attack! lol...for all the right reasons of course. *wiping tears* .... you know where I am if you need ANYTHING...I can't wait to see her again :) :) :) ((((Hugs)))))

Grace said...

I'm sure you're having mixed emotions on the change...it's exciting, scary, happy...and I'm happy for you since this is something you've wanted so badly.

I know that this will work out for you, CB, and your two girls. Enjoy!

Susan said...

Tammy...

When the going gets tough, the tough get knitting.

I know you know Velda has had some incredibly bad health news. It's going to be a rough journey for her, and she'll need a lot of support from her friends. Although we want to, we can't be there all the time for her... but I propose we make a token of our love and encouragement that she can keep by her side all the time as a reminder of the friends who stand with her.

A hug blanket, comprised of many squares knit or crocheted by those who care for her, would be just the thing. I need to find the knitters and crocheters in her circle of friends to help out with this... although I know she travels mostly in cross-stitch circles, I bet there's a fair bit of cross-over love of fabric arts.

I need held finding these knitters and crocheters. I can handle the logistics from there, but will you help me to reach out to those who would like to contribute a square or two to the hug? How can we reach out... divvy up her Facebook friends list and go through them all? Do you have any ideas?

Have all interested parties get in touch with me; when I have an idea as to how many we have, I can come up with further directions as to size of squares etc from there.

This project is best as a clandestine effort... I'd rather Miss V didn't know about it until we present the completed work to her. I don't have your email address so will post this to a blog post she's already commented on so she's not likely to see it... you can delete this comment if you wish.

Thank you.


--
Susan
susan.anderson.forster*at*gmail.com
http://www.thefabricofherreality.blogspot.com/