Our Relationship Is Changing

The Way I See It #27

Do not kiss your children so they will

kiss you back but so they will kiss their

children, and their children's children.

~Noah benShea

Poet/Philosopher

I think it is fitting that today I stopped at Starbucks and my cup message be one of my favorite messages. I made the decision while reading my cup and drinking my Non Fat Chai Tea Latte that I need to change my ways.

My ways with food and money need to change. I'm in the worst mental place ever in regards to my body and food. It has been years since I've felt this way. I wake up every day dreading the thought of getting dressed. Nothing fits and I'll be damned if I'll spend another penny on more clothing in whatever size! I'll just not do it.

I'm sick of myself, I'm sick of my stomach weight. My middle is like the inside of a pillow. It is all pushy and moldable (is that even a word?). I hate it. There was a time, in a different life, that I was starting to muscularly cut in with abs near the bottom of my rib cage. Now, there is nothing but a flab of flubber.

There are things I can be doing and things I should be doing and I'm not doing them! I no longer have the drive to push myself to be more than I am. I like who I am as a person as far as how I live in regards to treating other people, but I don't like that I no longer make myself a priority. I'm sick of being what I am physically, but I don't want to move or be prompted to move in a scheduled structured way. What the hell is wrong with me? As I've said, I used to be very driven and motivated. I loved working out. I loved the feel of the sweat and the burn of a muscle ache. Where did that go? What happened to change all that?

I need to do some internalizing and prioritizing to figure out what is up with me. Oh ya, what's up? ---- My weight is up and my clothing size is up. I can't even imagine what is going on in regards to my overall health! AUUGHHHHH

Starbuck Cup - Moving Message

Madeleine K. Albright

Diplomat

There are numerous cup messages that I get that don't do a thing for me. They don't make me think about a single thing and at times, once I've read them I never think of them again. The cup message is as fun for me as the joy of that first sip of liquid heaven - non-fat chai tea latte.

This message ranks up there in my top 4. There are 3 others I get that really move me. When I get them again, I will share with you. One has to do with running/walking and the other 2 pertain to being loved, how you're loved and kissing your children is the finally message that made me stop and ponder for a moment.

The last time I got this particular message, I was with Velda. It was the night we went to make the return at Home Depot. It was fitting because here was a situation where one incredible woman was helping another. Not meaning I'm an incredible woman (I'm not fishing for compliments), but referring to Velda as the incredible woman! To end a fun night with a trip to Starbucks and with such a fitting cup message was perfect. I would have posted the pic then, but I totally forgot and pitched the cup. My bad.

I've been in a place where I wouldn't have made it through without the support of of incredible woman that I can call friends. It wasn't even that they were friends that they helped me. I remember this woman saleslady at the Brick that sold me my new bed, after my separation. I was still emotionally raw and when we were talking about whether or not I was going to buy this new bed, she asked me why I needed/wanted it. I told her, in my emotionally overwrought state, I cried, of course. It was then that I knew I needed a new bed, to assuage the demons of a married bed with a cheating history (not in my own bed, but outside of it), that I knew it was time. That woman was one of the women that help another woman need. No special place in hell for her, but a wonderful place in the history of me getting from there to here. Pam was along for the purchase of the new bed which was just what I needed, another woman that got me from that time to this better time.

The list of those that helped me is long and plenty. You all know who you are and you all know how you helped in your own little, or not so little way.

There is a very special person in my life that is going through a tough time. She is sadly being hurt in a friendship with another woman. It is painful to watch one hurt and know there isn't much you can do, but listen and be there. I hope I do the message justice in the sense that I can now be the woman that helps another woman. It has been proven you can make a difference, even if at the time you don't know your impact in that person's life.

Chai Tea Latte Grande and sooo much more

As what I see becoming a very expensive habit and one that needs to be curtailed quickly, is an addiction to Starbucks Chai Tea Latte. Not only is this making a dent in my pocketbook, but also a lump on my rear end. It's not an all bad thing, this Starbucks addiction, I'm getting in some good reading too. Starbucks has The Way I See It messages on their beveridge cups. Today's cup, message #232, is awesome and more than true for so many people, myself included.

You simply can't make someone love you if they don't. You must choose someone who already loves you. If you choose someone who does not love you this is the sort of love you must want. -- Isreal Horovitz Playwright/Screenwriter, quote from his new play, The Secret of Mme. Bonnard's Bath.