Good things cometh

I don't know how it happened or when it happened. I'm just extremely grateful it did. A little background - Lily is home from school sick today. I told her last night I would be home this morning because I had things to do, but I would be as quiet as possible for her to still sleep while I puttered away.

She got up about an hour ago and we've done nothing but talk and chatter the whole time. She got up and right away noticed that all the trim has been painted. Now the walls still need to be done, so the difference is startling. She said the house will soon enough start too look better, if I just keep at it. And then, "Is there anything, I can do?" I just about shit! I thanked her for her offer, but it was about the time for me to start getting ready for work - darn it.

She then started talking to me about things. She said it's sad to be finally getting the house finished and fixed up only to be possibly selling it. I have to agree with her. She then told me she is going to miss this house (the only home she remembers). I agree with her. Then the tears started, tears from both of us. I tried to reassure her and ask her not to get too concerned because as of right now, there are so many things with the 'new' house that Todd and I aren't even sure it's going to work out for us. She cried extremely hard at times, but continued talking. I gave my darling baby a hug and kiss and left her to her tears and sadness for a bit.

After the initial onslaught of tears, she was ready to talk again and this time the topic path was much different than I could have ever dreamed. I told her Todd, his brother in law, sister and myself were going to see the house on Sunday. Todd's BIL used to sell real estate, so we want him to look at the house with a discriminative eye. I threw out the offer to Lily that she could come along and she said she just might.

The conversation carried on in bits and pieces, with things like I want to see it now -as in NOW. I want to paint MY NEW room light blue with silver accents.... can I get a new bed for my new room? She then asks me what is my favorite thing about the house? My answer 2 bathrooms, which brought great bouts of laughter from her.... we fight over our little itty bitty, badly in need of renovations of a bathroom.

I want to thank each and everyone of you that has posted comments urging me to stay positive and do what I need to do. I hoped Lily would come around eventually, but didn't expect it to happen as fast as all this. I know we will still be faced with numerous trials, be it this house we buy or another one, but for now there is a peaceful calm once again within the walls of my home.

I learn so much everyday. This morning I was exhausted and overwhelmed and feeling more than a bit defeated. This afternoon I feel like a million bucks and as I'm going to be able to win in this situation! Lesson learned - never give up hope. Keep reaching for what you're wanting. Who knows what you might get in the end.
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In answer to a few questions posted in the comment section -
Great approach idea from Pumpkin -
I am going to tackle the house room by room. I'm going to have Dave look and see if he can do trim and if he can, I'm going to have him trim out Lily's room - the walls, window and door. I will then paint the trim. I will also see if he can build closet door headers and hang the bedroom door, which will then need painting. If he can do these things for me, Lily's room will be finished.

A New Chapter is Beginning

My goodness I am certainly chatty lately. I know, in person, I talk a lot, but in the land of blogs, I can be quiter than the normal me. I don't think I have that many interesting things to say. Now, my head is just all over the place.

There are so many things happening. I'm excited about most of it, but a bit apprehensive about some parts of these changes too. Todd and I are going to look at a house together tomorrow. Not a house for him or for me, but for us! This is something I knew would be happening, but now that it is I'm "OMG" about it all. I'm soooo excited, but as I said, there is going to be a lot changes. The house is in the country and I'm right now living in the suburbs and have been for numerous years. I'm looking forward to a change of scenery and pace. I'm tired of having people right on top of me, even as much as I love my neighbours.

I have wanted a simpler life for a while and a country home represents that for me. I know what is really holding me back is Lily. This will be a major change for her and something she is already fighting. Not the living with Todd part, but the country living part. I think if she could/would give it a chance, she might find she likes the country. There have already been comments made that are basically emotional blackmail, something I will no longer allow to hold me hostage. I lived too many years that way and refuse to do it again. I've heard the comments that she'll leave and go live with her sister. Thankfully, she's not of an age that she can legally leave, unlike her sister - another story for another day and crazy nuts, if you ask me. No one does ask me though. I want so much to embrace these changes and be happy with them, the ensuing fight will, in a small way, take away some of the shine.

I'm entitled to happiness and I want that happiness. I think I deserve on some small scale!

Now that Todd and I are seriously looking at houses, not that either of us are in any sort of hurry, I have to get things done around my house. I called the contractor that worked on my front door last spring, to get estimates on hanging closet doors and building headers. After talking with Todd this morning, I'm also going have Scott (contractor), look at my bathroom and give me an estimate on doing that as well. Insert major fit throwing scream right here, right now! Oh well, crap happens!!!!! I already own the closet doors and all the necessary parts for the bathroom renovations. All I will have to pay at this point is for Scott to do the work. At a time when I'm trying to streamline finances, this rather sucks, but that's life. It will be money well spent in the long run.

I don't know. How about we just keep a positive outlook that Lily realizes this isn't to hurt her, but just one of live's changes that you face and learn from. Keep an open mind and you never know what me come your way. She doesn't see it that way though, no matter how hard I try.

With all this worry about Lily, I'm still smiling. That's something good right? It's not selfish to want this, is it?

OMG! Can you hear me screaming

I don't know whether I should cry or scream. My youngest daughter just gave me the best Christmas present that money can buy. I say 'that money can buy', because as much as this is the coolest present ever, I'm trying to teach the girls (and failing miserably) that Christmas is not about money!

Lily just gave me two tickets to see Keith Urban in concert in Ottawa December 14th! I'm blown away. She ordered the tickets through Pam and gave them to me today! I'm soooo excited and so proud of her, you can't even imagine. Included in my gift box was the little turtle from a few days back. She bought him for me as well! What a cool gift! Is it December 14th yet????

Off to my sweet dreams of Keith and knowing that I'm truly blessed with 2 amazing daughters that are fast on their way to becoming incredible women!