Wednesday, August 16, 2006

Watch the turtle

With the excitement of yesterday behind me I'm feeling a bit of an anxiousness. I didn't see this coming. Is it the release of adrenaline that got me through yesterday? Probably! I'm not happy with the way I'm feeling today so I'm going to push forward but yet again to get out of a slump I'm not even in yet in an effort to not hit another slump.

The signing of the separation agreement was rather anticlimatic. It was extrememly difficult to take this major step and have to do it with Rob right there. A good thing is we each signed with my lawyer while the other sat in the waiting room. I would much rather been there by myself, but it wasn't to be that way, sadly. Rob just doesn't understand the destruction left in his wake. He just wanted to talk and 'catch up'. I chose to answer his questions, but to give nothing more than 'stranger being polite' answers. I did take great joy in his befuddlement of not understanding my turtle tattoo. I shouldn't be so shallow to take joy out of something like this, but the pain to get to this point was just too deep for me to share with him, not to mention that very pain was doled out by his hand, actions and words. No thanks, I'll keep that to myself or those that love and support me now!

I always think about why things are they way they are, how they come to be and yesterday was no different. In the lawyers office was a small book with quotes and sayings that I found so true and some very much in touch with what I've been dealing. I was waiting for Rob to finishing signing when I came across this quote that fits me (hopefully) to a 'T'.

Watch the turtle; he only makes progress when he sticks his neck out

I've a busy day ahead of me and I'm hoping it will keep my mind occupied and the melancholy from taking over. So, on that note I'd best be getting doing the things that are going to keep me busy!

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